How to act on the zone

Category: the Rant Board

Post 1 by Godzilla-On-Toast (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Tuesday, 01-May-2007 2:42:39

So, young grasshopper, you're new and want to know exactly what the best way is to act on the Zone, especially on the boards? Well, here are some great tips to get you started.
1. If you are ignorant or a total jerk, your opinion is just as worthy of hearing as that of somebody who actually has something constructive or interesting to say, merely because you proclaim the right. Anyone who disagrees with your opinion, no matter how stupid, is just a big old meanie who's out to get you.
2. Nobody is born with a life. It is something one must get separate from oneself. However, although we will continuously instruct you to get one if we feel, in our infinite wisdom, that you need one, we will not tell you where it is to be found because you're not cool enough to know. You're on your own on the Zone!
3. If we find that you are socially awkward or inept or show signs of being lonely or desperate, we will ridicule you, but we will not try to do anything to help you become a more tollerable person. You're on your own on the Zone!
4. Only those who are extremely physically attractive or who otherwise live up to society's narrow but very wisely invented standards of beauty will be treated respectfully. If you are overweight or otherwise physically ugly, freakish, or un-normal, you will be mercilessly ridiculed until you magically transform into something pleasing to us. We are ordered by human nature to do this, because if we don't, an unspecified but very bad thing will happen to us, else we'll just lose our friends and die soon.
5. Although the Singles Spit Swap board exists for you to post a personal ad on the Zone, we are under obligation to shoot you down for making such a post. Better get used to it, because if we don't try and dissuade you from posting there or otherwise tell you how lonely and stupid and desperate and ugly you obviously must be, unspecified bad things will surely happen to us, or we'll just lose our cool status which means the end of the world.
And those are only starters. Maybe other people have more to add.

Post 2 by laced-unlaced (Account disabled) on Tuesday, 01-May-2007 2:58:51

lol...that's a good start, it should really be on the main page, so people can see it. lol

Post 3 by Austin (the magic fan!) on Tuesday, 01-May-2007 3:20:25

well. the zone is a great place. As far as i know no one gets shot down on the singles spit swap bored.

Post 4 by blbobby (Ooo you're gona like this!) on Tuesday, 01-May-2007 8:22:38

G-O-T, good beginning. However, you forgot to advise folks to check their typing and spelling to make sure there enough misspelled words and gramatical errors so they will not come off as a know-it-all on here.

Oh yes, it's also bad form to say another poster's writings are good or anything like that. You might appear to be a thoughtful person, and we zoners are all bad asses around here.

So, everyone, get to unspell checking those posts.

Bob

Post 5 by Senior (I've now got the bronze prolific poster award! now going for the silver award!) on Tuesday, 01-May-2007 12:34:40

I disagree on point 4, abnormal behaviour on the Zone asppears often to be encouraged. To add to what's already been said though, you must have exactly the right level of intelligence. Not only will having too much intelligence on the Zone cause you to be criticised and insulted, so will having too little intelligence too. The same can be said for grammatical standards. Oh though the ignore feature is there, if you are known to be using it, you face discouragement and insults from those who you're not ignoring, but if you ignore everybody, at least you won't have to deal with that.

Post 6 by Godzilla-On-Toast (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Tuesday, 01-May-2007 13:24:05

But of course, since you are on your own on the Zone, what with everyone being all hardline and all, you will never know how smart you're supposed to be until you actually post. If you don't know, you will not be told.

Post 7 by Selena Fan (Account disabled) on Tuesday, 01-May-2007 22:34:48

This is so true! The other thing is that if you're a Christian and if you say anything about God! They chew you out for that! Oh yeah you got to use a lot of profanity too!

Post 8 by blbobby (Ooo you're gona like this!) on Tuesday, 01-May-2007 23:31:20

Plus you must try and agree with everyone, don't ever disagree.

If someone disagrees with you, you must attack them personally for their girlfriends, boyfriends, dogs, cats, and everything else that has nothing to do with the discussion.

And never ever make fun of the community leaders or admin. They are a humorless lot. Especially, don't mention the failed april fools joke.

Bob

Post 9 by rdfreak (THE ONE AND ONLY TRUE-BLUE KANGA-KICKIN AUSIE) on Wednesday, 02-May-2007 0:57:03

well austin, let me tell you young sir, you haven't been looking at it hard enough! Just about anyone who posts on that board can expect to be shot down by unkind individuals; mainly because they wouldn't ever do it, and anyone who does is just considered "not smart". Not saying I would want to post adds on the net, but I respect those who do and wish them luck! .. yes, of course some people can be laughable when they post such adds; it's all in the way they express themselves! Anyone demanding to meet a "fat blind chick" or whatever, is, asking for drama and, in my opinion, quite understandably.
Very well put godsilla, and so true of an unfortunate growing number of board posters.

Post 10 by Empress Lana (Account disabled) on Wednesday, 02-May-2007 7:13:29

Politeness is, apparently, childish behaviour. Once polite, you will be ridiculed for such and saverely repremanded.

Post 11 by Empress Lana (Account disabled) on Wednesday, 02-May-2007 7:26:39

Oh and your friends are only your friends until someone tells them not to be.

Post 12 by changedheart421 (I've now got the bronze prolific poster award! now going for the silver award!) on Wednesday, 02-May-2007 7:46:47

I am voerweight what the hell do you ahve to say about that. ha.

Post 13 by Selena Fan (Account disabled) on Thursday, 03-May-2007 16:53:11

Bob and Mya I agree with your last post on tthis topic!

Post 14 by speedie (move over school!) on Wednesday, 09-May-2007 8:37:05

Godzilla what a miserable feikin eejit you are, you sound like an 80yr old drunk I knew, who hated everyone who walked and breathed including me can you imagine that? Mostly he hated himself, twisted and evil so he was..you're a great example of how not to act on here.

Post 15 by Godzilla-On-Toast (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Saturday, 12-May-2007 15:59:24

Speedie, I think you've got me pegged wrong. The original post was really more sarcasm and observation than anything else. And as for me, I hate very few people, or so I believe and I'm neither evil or twisted, although my sense of humor can be evil and twisted, I admit that. If you still want to see me as the bad guy, that's your thing, but it isn't me.

Post 16 by forereel (Just posting.) on Sunday, 13-May-2007 0:40:46

Love this. hahahaha

Post 17 by Selena Fan (Account disabled) on Monday, 14-May-2007 2:01:24

Here's another example users accusing other users of bieng something they're not!

Post 18 by Empress Lana (Account disabled) on Monday, 14-May-2007 3:40:21

Good one Hope.

Post 19 by Selena Fan (Account disabled) on Wednesday, 16-May-2007 2:42:06

Wow Mya thank you! This is the first time any one has told me that I've made a good post!

Post 20 by Izzito (This site is so "educational") on Wednesday, 16-May-2007 3:42:57

good want a cookie?

Post 21 by Grace (I've now got the ggold prolific poster award! wahoo! well done to me!) on Wednesday, 16-May-2007 4:20:50

Cookie...?? sounds delightful.

Care for a cup of freshly brewed coffee?
Mmmm its flavored with chocolate hazlenut
(if not, various drinks are on ice ~ help yourself)

Post 22 by Godzilla-On-Toast (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Wednesday, 16-May-2007 8:11:42

I've got some lightly frosted old-fashioned oatmeal cookies to have with that most scrumptious coffee. However, Selena Fan, in regards to your post about Christians being chewed out, I think anyone having a strong opinion for or against any religion seems to have somebody ready and willing to do the chewing out. Now I'm not talking about you in the following statement because I don't know you at all, but there are some, and I do mean some, folks who call themselves Christian but who are not nice people. They preach tolerance but do not practice it, and the same goes with non-believers. Although I admit I do tend to love irreverent humor pointed at Christians, at least the more extreme hypocritical kind, I really do respect people's right to believe what they wish, unless of course part of what they believe is to hunt down and murder one Zoner by the handle of Godzilla-on-toast! LOL! Then we might have a problem. Hahahaha!

Post 23 by Godzilla-On-Toast (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Thursday, 17-May-2007 13:15:00

Oooo, looky, I found a new one! I found a new one! If you are responding to somebody's post, you must always praise either the poster or what they've posted. Never be critical or negative in any way, because positive is good and negative is bad. If you have anything negative to say, you must remain silent until your dying day because being negative is yucky and makes people feel yucky, too. Your opinion only matters if you are positive. Also, it is always good to have an open mind and always bad to have a closed one.

Post 24 by Empress Lana (Account disabled) on Thursday, 17-May-2007 15:34:46

Um, uh, just got something in the back of my mind, ahem! Sertain closed-minded individuals may be respected and if you are, made fun of or harassed, by one of these individuals, it is considered rude to say anything against them. Um, No, not the CL's before you ask, LOLOLOLOL! JK there.

Post 25 by Austin (the magic fan!) on Thursday, 17-May-2007 16:25:35

no, say stuff about god hope. god god god god.
praise god!!!

Post 26 by Austin (the magic fan!) on Thursday, 17-May-2007 16:26:16

and you can have a lot of inteligence on here. i believe you all have got it wrong. I enjoy the zone. i no problems with no one here. that's why i love it.

Post 27 by Godzilla-On-Toast (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Friday, 18-May-2007 6:14:26

Just a quick reminder in order to keep the thread on track. This is sarcasm, so please do not take it seriously. This is why it's on the rant board.

Post 28 by Damia (I'm oppinionated deal with it.) on Friday, 18-May-2007 6:30:41

praise saten and have a hash browney and have a mizerable day.

Post 29 by Godzilla-On-Toast (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Friday, 18-May-2007 16:35:05

You worship him with pot brownies? He's no fun, that Satan, because you never really get what you want when you ask, plus pot brownies just don't go with Satan. You'd want to find some human blood or gruesome things like that if you really have to do the Satan thing. I'll take the hash brownies, and the coffee and the cookies and worship, well, I think I'll worship me! It doesn't hurt anybody, and nobody else has the guts to, so why the hell not? Hahahahahaha!

Post 30 by HonorGuardBuglerUSReserve (Account disabled) on Friday, 18-May-2007 18:29:49

Oh my Gosh, how stupid can you get?

Post 31 by Austin (the magic fan!) on Friday, 18-May-2007 18:46:27

Ok, i knew that but thanks for reiterating it.

Post 32 by Selena Fan (Account disabled) on Saturday, 19-May-2007 19:51:30

God Zila on Toast I know you weren't talking to me personally! You are talking about fundamilist Christians! As for me I also have Jewish friends! Thank you Austin! God rules!

Post 33 by Empress Lana (Account disabled) on Sunday, 20-May-2007 4:55:30

LOL! We can get very stupid and are prowd of it! Well at least I am. LOLOL!

Post 34 by Selena Fan (Account disabled) on Monday, 21-May-2007 3:40:34

Yeah that's right Mya you said it girl lol! It can be fun to be stupid once in a while!

Post 35 by FlyingPhoenix (move over school!) on Monday, 21-May-2007 6:01:02

this has to be the dumbest topic on here

Post 36 by HonorGuardBuglerUSReserve (Account disabled) on Saturday, 26-May-2007 9:29:58

Um yeah, pretty much. It's not like drum corps where there is a member handbook. Act like what ever you want.

Post 37 by wonderwoman (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Wednesday, 13-Jun-2007 19:21:23

oh yeah godzilla-on-toast, you forgot one, don't ever try to apologize for anything around here, or put sorry in the subject line, unlkess ykiou are a gluton for verbal abuse. although others can just as easily skip over it if they wish, that would just take the whole fun out of it, since people love to shoot down a post, simply because they consider it boring nad uninteresting, no matter how harmless it may be. if you post, most likely it will be ridiculed as pointless, because everyone else thinks other posts are pointless unless it's their own.
wonderwoman

Post 38 by Empress Lana (Account disabled) on Thursday, 14-Jun-2007 4:08:19

Um, people love to dredge up old topics and use them as insult competitions. As in, who can make this person feel more shitty than they already did when they posted this 3 months ago?

Post 39 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Thursday, 14-Jun-2007 13:22:10

amen to that amy!

Post 40 by Empress Lana (Account disabled) on Thursday, 14-Jun-2007 17:20:35

Thanks!

Post 41 by Empress Lana (Account disabled) on Thursday, 14-Jun-2007 17:28:12

Oh yeah, just thought of another one. Some people will not read the dates on posts and will use sed dredged topics to insite, um, uh, make people feel bad. LOL!

Post 42 by wonderwoman (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Thursday, 14-Jun-2007 20:05:12

well as with anything else, if yiou don't like seeing old topics, you don't have to read them. I will not apologize for bringing up an old topic. if the poster doesn't want me bringing up his or her old topic, then he or she can just ask me nicely not to bring up their topic and i will respect that, thank you,
wonderwoman

Post 43 by Godzilla-On-Toast (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Friday, 15-Jun-2007 0:05:28

Here's another one. All posts that are negative are bad merely for being negative, no matter how well-meant or wisely written. Also, all negative comments should be taken extremely personally even if they have nothing to do with the person posting. Welcome to the 21st century where, if you're not a victim, you're not living.

Post 44 by wonderwoman (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Friday, 15-Jun-2007 1:02:42

oh well, guess i've started living on here, lol.
wonderwoman